Decision Making, Risk Taking, and Accepting Responsibility for Choices

Decision Making, Risk Taking, and Accepting Responsibility

Yes, I know the title is long. I haven’t posted anything in my self analysis section in awhile because I’ve been busy. Went to Connecticut to visit my beautiful one year old granddaughter. Left a job. Began a new job. Got involved with “another” multi-level marketing (MLM) business.

Excuses?

These sound like excuses don’t they? Maybe they are or maybe they’re valid reasons. In either case, it’s me, explaining myself to you. But why? I don’t owe anyone an explanation especially since this is my blog and I write for the love of writing. That’s the point – people tend to “explain” themselves to everyone all the time.

Explanations

Explaining. We all do this to some degree or another – every day. We typically explain ourselves even to people who really aren’t all that important in our lives. What a waste of energy!

Energy drain

Do you know that when we explain our choices we drain ourselves of energy? Most of us “explainers” are strong “people-pleasers”. We often care more about what others think of us, than we think of ourselves. We do this out of a need to feel ACCEPTED.

Beliefs

We believe we can’t be happy (accept ourselves) unless a) we make others happy, or b) we need others to make us happy. And that’s simply not true. We can CHOOSE to BEHAPPY. All on our own. No one else needs to DO anything for us, nor do we need to do anything for anyone else.

What a concept!

Do you know where your true JOY comes from?

Being happy with yourself. Accept yourself. Be happy with your life – your journey. If you’re not happy perhaps you’ve made some wrong choices or put yourself in a situation you’d rather not be in. I say “wrong choices” only because ultimately your choices didn’t make you happy! But you learned life lessons. Perhaps you’re feeling sorry for yourself. Give yourself credit for who you are NOW.

Learn and Choose

Choice

You can make a very powerful choice. You can choose to be happy amidst whatever circumstances you find yourself in or you can choose to make different choices.

Sit still – right where you are… for a few minutes and just – BE.

Think of all of the good things in your life. Times when you made wonderful choices. You have every reason in the world to be happy!

There have been times in my life when my supervisor or manager at work wondered why I didn’t make decisions. Typically it was because I was waiting on something or someone to do something first. When I read this article it perfectly explained that situation. I didn’t make certain work decisions because I was waiting for someone’s approval. All that waiting was so draining. And it also seemed that sometimes I’d make a decision only to be criticized (sometimes severely). It put me in the vicious cycle of never being able to win. We’ve all heard people say, “no matter what I do – I can’t win” or “you can’t please everyone”. And that was me – until now.

I make work decisions based upon a risk taking matrix. In the most basic terms it goes something like this:

  • Is this decision in my best interest? (You sacrifice yourself and your happiness if whatever decision your making is for someone, anyone else.)
  • Is this choice best for the company? (This includes considering all ethics, laws, etc.)
  • In 20, 50, or 100 years will this matter?
  • What is the worst that could happen?

I recognize and accept responsibility. Making a wrong decision almost always can be reversed – if the need is great enough. And I do not work in a field where lives depend upon my decisions. Point is, if the decision is mine to make – I must make it with the best information I understand at the time not necessarily by considering “the need to please others”. There is a time and place for building consensus among team members but this is not the focus of this post.

It’s no wonder people-pleasers have a hard time trusting their own intuition. They’ve been waiting on someone else to do something – anything to relieve them of the need to “make a decision.” I have actually known people who cannot decide upon what restaurant to eat at, or even what item to order once they get there!

A former manager I worked with a few years ago told me one of the traits he looks for in those he promotes is the ability to make a decision! His statement still rings in my ears.

Fear

How many people are scared to make a decision?

We must learn to become risk takers and accept responsibility for our choices if we ever hope to become enlightened and be our best most joyous self.

Blocks

I have blocked my own energy and creative power in the past by feeling a deep need to always explain myself. I am now learning to be much more aware and when I feel the need to explain I think for a moment and reason it out.

I begin to think different thoughts.

Happy thoughts.

It sounds easy enough as I write this, but I tell you – in the moment it’s not so easy.

I almost have to force myself to smile first, before I can guide my thoughts to something happy. People that aren’t “explainers” probably would have no idea what I’m talking about.

In control

The other day a person said something to me in front of others that I didn’t like. I felt the need to explain my side but I didn’t. I felt all of the emotions (due to my thoughts) about the experience well up inside me, my face grew hot, and though I didn’t look in a mirror I knew my chest and neck were probably red, but by gradually and systematically changing my thoughts (changing my focus) within less than five minutes I felt back in control. Empowered. No need to explain. No need to get angry. No need to do anything.

Think about what is most important in your life. Who is most important in your life. Put yourself and how you feel – with the goal to be happy – first. Notice the better you feel – the better you feel. Why? To feel better! In turn, you and those you love will feel better too. People around you pick up on your energy. We Are All Connected whether you realize it or not.

If someone is consistently draining you of your energy you only have two choices. Let whatever they say roll off of you as easily as water rolls off a ducks back. Or let the person (or job) go – out of your life.

When someone dissatisfies me in any way, I tell myself, “thank you for helping me make a better decision.” If it happens to be because of some poor service in a restaurant I choose not to go back. If it’s a business situation, I end the association. I’ve quit going to particular service providers. Changed doctors. You name it.

There’s plenty of options out there and I’m not going to stick around someone or remain in a situation that’s not in my best interest. Why would I? I don’t want to come home and complain to my spouse about things I certainly am adult enough to change.

I am quite sure that my words may not teach you how to make decisions, take risks, or accept responsibility for your choices. You may choose to completely disagree with me and that’s okay. I won’t try to change you. 🙂

About My Blog Name

Take It Upon Yourself is about accepting responsibility for yourself. Your health. Your dreams. Your talents. Your passions and desires. It’s about knowing who YOU are.

TakeItUponYourself

Who are you? Have you asked yourself this question? Have you said, “Self, who am I”?

Take a look in the mirror – go ahead, take a good look. Do you know who you are? I realize I may err on being a bit annoying here. But I just wonder how many of us really examine ourselves – and ask ourselves this question. How well do we know our own unique person… mind, body, and soul (or spirit if you’re so inclined to believe in a spiritual self). Each of us have a unique set of fingerprints to remind us that we’re all different, particular, specific individuals.

I’ve been asking myself who I am since turning fifty (50) years of age. I am on a journey of self discovery. I can describe attributes and characteristics of myself, but who am I?

I have discovered that I am Energy, focused in a physical body. I am the sum total of my previous choices and experiences.

I’ve accomplished many things that I never thought I would. I’ve been given everything I have ever wanted. Along the way I did some things I would not do again – but I learned lessons from those experiences. I can’t explain why I did some of the things I did, but I think I had good reasons at the timeI think most people act on the best information they understand at the time.

So, I can’t condemn my former self since I acknowledge that my past choices taught me lessons and turned me into the person I accept as my self today. I believe love is a choice. Life, humility, gratitude, sanity – all are choices.

I have also come to an awareness that beliefs are just thoughts we keep thinking over and over – we always have the power within us to think different (better) thoughts and change ourselves if we don’t like what we see in the mirror. Me? I’m always changing!

So, who am I? LOL

I accept responsibility, fully, for who I am. And I deeply love and accept myself for who I am.

I am a mother, a new grandmother, and wife. I’m a highly responsible individual. I take it upon myself to feel better and make healthy choices everyday. I’m fabulous. 🙂 And I bet you’re fabulous too!

I am more than my mind, body, and soul / spirit. I am the culmination of everything I’ve experienced. And I stand on GREAT shoulders. Strong, loyal, God-loving, parents, grandparents, great-grandparents, and so on.

I have also had great mentors and teachers along the way too! Thankfully, God gave me one in particular who proved the value of higher education to me many years ago (because I couldn’t wait to finish high school and had never wanted to go to college). She proved me wrong. Obtaining two degrees kept me gainfully employed on my career path!

Some of my ancestors were persecuted for their beliefs, religion, and even their race, which knowing this – keeps me grounded and humble. I believe that also is the reason, or at least one reason, why I am an empath. I am strong. A survivor of hurt, pains, and traumas. A survivor of former marriages, of loves lost.

I look in the mirror and see a woman who’s changed – a lot!

I now eat foods that I didn’t eat five (5) years ago. I beat asthma. I’m a creative and technical career woman. I’ve co-written songs (with my talented soul-mate hubby), and tried all sorts of alternative health modalities that most of my family and friends haven’t yet explored. I’ve gained weight, but I’ve lost it too! I consider myself somewhat of a renaissance woman. Forging ahead and leading my daughter and granddaughter down new trails.

Taking it upon myself, I want something better for them, an easier path perhaps, than what I had. And I know a lot of people who feel the same way. They want to give their kids more than they had – not material things exactly – but knowledge!

Knowledge is power. An explored, informed, due diligence done, and educated response to life – wow! Just imagine the time I’ll save them, and maybe some pain too.

I heard it once said that a wise person learns not from experience, but from the experiences of others.

I’d like to go down that road less traveled. So, I invite you to… take it upon yourself.

Imagine who you want to be. Won’t you?