What do you do after?

What to do after?

After a loved one passes away, transitions to the Grand Beyond, and has their Continuation Day?

How long do we mourn? What else is there to do?

Well, I grieved, yes. But fairly soon after my daddy died, an awareness came upon me. And of course I had that vision, so that soothed my mind and calmed my emotions.

Grief dollars
Grief dollars

Good grief

How can grief be good? Who the hell came up with that old adage? Ugh!

I have cried and cried, but at some point I realized, I couldn’t change anything.

So, why all the tears? What good was that doing? Okay, I was processing my emotions and letting them out. That’s helpful perhaps. I was cleansing my body by the act of crying. But why was I crying?

Guilt

I can’t change anything in the past.

I can’t spend anymore time with my parents (in the physical), or talk with them anymore.

So, because of that, because there is no more time to sit with my mom or dad, I feel guilty for not visiting them more, for not listening to them more, and for not taking more of their wise advice. I feel guilty for a lot of things.

However, as I allow those feelings to flow over and through my mind and body, washing my heart center, I realize those are simply my thoughts (my perceptions) of situations that occurred in the past. Past hurts were previously discussed (in many cases, YEARS ago) and lovingly forgiven, so there’s no practical need for my mind to rethink on those times now. I have learned that regret is simply an action of the mind. I don’t know if anyone really understands why the mind does that, but I think most people’s minds go through those gyrations.

Eternal Gratitude

As I sit NOW in this time and space, I feel utter and thorough GRATITUDE for ALL. Ahh, the Eternal Gratitude!

My beautiful parents gave me sooo many priceless gifts! They created ME! They gave me life, breath, and were my most important teachers! And as much as I love, speak and write about them, no amount of words can begin to describe the immense gratitude I FEEL. Ahh!!

I am so glad that both of my parents knew I loved them. Oh, how glad I am that we always told each other, “I love you” and “hugs & kisses” each time we talked!

Learning

We learn through the mistakes, miscommunications, fault-finding, pain, and more. And we learn humility. We learn grace. We learn that we can’t take anything with us when we transition from this life. And how many of us think that day will never come. But, it will.

Time

We count it and think we can keep it. We say our watches are time keeping.

For some, our Continuation Day will come too soon. For nearly everyone, it will come unexpectedly.

Time keeping
Time keeping

Shine

In every moment, are we exposing our best selves to each other? Are we a shining light?

Stones to Diamonds

Stones to Diamonds

What’s the difference between the diamond and the rock?

Pressure. ❤️🦋🌀

And the cutting. Look how the skillfully cut diamond SHINES!!!

From stones to diamonds, pressure over time makes the difference. Do we buckle and cry under pressure, or grow stronger emotionally?

In loving memory

Let’s enjoy (IN joy) each other. Let’s enjoy each moment.

No moments are wasted. All bring value.

Let’s talk. Laugh. Video conference. Take the road trip. And fly to new lands!

It is easier, and feels better, to release the grief and celebrate in Gratitude. Eternally.

Hugs and kisses!!

❤️🦋🌀🙏💋

UPDATE: Less than 24 hours after posting this, I received an email with words that eloquently summarize:

Skills for Awakening Skills for Awakening

Ah, I love this BIG WINK from the Universe today, from Ram Giri Braun (my first guru teacher, whose teachings continue to live on… thank you. Namaste. OM) ❤️🦋🌀

We Are All Connected. OM

Many blessings to you in ALL ways.

Check out this original song, Angels All Around You. It’s one of my favorites, written by my husband and performed and recorded in a Nashville, TN studio. And this, my husband’s latest #OriginalSong, destined to become a #Hit – It Only Takes a Moment

A BIT ABOUT ME:

An Amazon bestselling author of two co-authored books: “Transform Your Life Book 2 Inspirational Stories and Expert Advice” and “Energy of Receiving”, available on Amazon.

Plus, the brand new book that’s been in the making for 13 years, Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life, is now available for online sale and distribution (PDF format).

Buy it here: https://beingwhollyvibrant.wordpress.com/2018/09/12/book-launch-take-it-upon-yourself-to-live-a-wholly-vibrant-life/

Be your most soul-Connected you.

Information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

Follow me on Twitter at: TakeOnYourself

Walking more than a mile in another’s moccasins

Walking more than a mile in another’s moccasins

Making judgments

My grandmother (of Cherokee Native American Indian descent) often said,

Never judge someone until you’ve walked a mile in their moccasins.

And apparently, as a child, those words soaked into me and became my mantra. And I became an empath. Or perhaps, I was born an empath and her words resonated with me and validated my nature. Either way, in my experience, being empathic has been like living on both edges of a sword. 

Never judge. Until you’ve walked a mile in their moccasins
Never judge. Until you’ve walked a mile in their moccasins

I’ve realized my life’s path has had me walk more than a mile in my mom’s moccasins–and also in my dad’s shoes. And I’m tired. Yet, profoundly grateful I’ve had such a multitude of experiences to learn so much.

No matter how many times I’ve pondered the heartache, the gut-wrenching, soul-shaking, events of my childhood–that I’ve recreated (knowingly or not) in my adult life, with some incredibly outlandish desire to FIX–I eventually cane to a knowing that I can’t fix anyone else. And I’m glad I figured that out before I met my third husband! 

No one can fix anyone else.

Just like that old joke, 

How many psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb? None. The light bulb has to want to be changed.

Repeating patterns

Unfortunately, even my children picked up the yoke of this dastardly twisted need to fix others, as they’ve fallen into some of the same relationship woes as I. And fortunately, all of us are in healthy relationships presently! Thank Limitless God we’ve all awakened from the lure of this whole “fixing” trap!

So, why am I writing this piercing note in the middle of the night?

Because I promised my daughter, if I accomplish one thing on this planet while I’m alive this time around, it is to break the “lather, rinse, and repeat” cycle of fixing–for my granddaughters. And all of my writing (both online and in books) is to ultimately leave earth-bound knowledge for my grandchildren. Of course, if any of these words help others, that’s icing on the proverbial cake! 

You see, I never knew Divine LOVE, until I held my first granddaughter in my arms. She (Jennifer Ann), means more to me than I could describe.

What can I deduce from this new found comprehension of having walked all of these miles, in my mother’s, and yes, some in my father’s moccasins?

That life’s not been easy. But, it was never my job to work out their issues.

Tempted to complain

My “love of my life” husband and I picked up a saying this past year that goes,

Not my circus, not my monkeys.

And whenever I start to complain about something that doesn’t really belong to me–someone else’s drama–my hubby will pop that quote out to me. I love him so much for bringing things like that to my attention! He knows the empath in me often gets sucked into other’s drama, because I always feel that I can help ease their pain–somehow.

The Universe presented us with that very same phrase while we were enjoying our big outdoor annual Awakening Into The Sun festival! My friend Mary Ann, owner of Awakened Fibers had a handmade wall hanging with the words, “Not my circus, not my monkeys” embroidered on it! How fun!

Not my problem

And as if that wasn’t enough, a few minutes later while visiting with Dr. Alison J. Kay, her assistant, Brenda, told us a new phrase that fully resonated with me. It was, 

You’ve heard it said to get your ducks in a row? But, they were never your ducks.

My goodness! What if the stuff I had taken on (for years), all of those “other people’s problems”, were never my ducks? I never needed to get any “ducks” in a row to straighten out my parents issues. Who did I think I was to feel burdened to do that? Ugh! And now you see why I am tired. Tired of carrying the emotional baggage of others–it was never my stuff to carry!

On the upside, I’ve had a successful (nearly thirty year) career (out of the need to walk in my dad’s technical “know-how” shoes). And after wanting a pair of real honest-to-God moccasins for years, I finally got some, and I’ve been wearing them everyday.

Wearing moccasins daily, I feel every pebble under my feet as I walk. And I love that! I’m constantly mindful that each challenge in life is as the grain of sand that produces a pearl in an oyster!

My daily walks provide me with the benefit of grounding daily, and the knowing that the wearing of these moccasins, physically brings my grandmother’s saying directly into my body—making her words experiential—instead of it just hanging around in my head like some mystical cloud.

So, yes, there are always positives. I know this. Why does it have to take some of us so long to figure things out?

Oh, because we’re programmed as children. Culturally, socially, and if you were raised in a religious faith, you (and I) were programmed. I’m glad I figured that out!

Cut the cords

Now, energetically at least, I’ve cut the cord of all of this for my granddaughters. 

Here and now I state, my grandchildren will not have to take any historical family burdens upon themselves. They can be self-filled. Self-motivated. They can help others as they choose. Free spirits! They can care for themselves first, without guilt. They can choose to do what they love! They do not have to repeat the sins of their parents, or of mine. They do not need to try and figure anything out. The past is the past and it is abSOULutely done.

I have broken this chain of fools.

Be here now. ❤️🦋🌀🙏☀️🌱

A bit about us:

My husband is an award-winning illustrator, plus he is a seasoned guitarist, bass player, and songwriter (of over 400 original songs). You can view some of his artwork and listen to all of his songs on http://RichardMurrey.com or check out his latest 24 songs here: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC53E21F-JlTW2iQmPcEIWkQ

I’m an Amazon bestselling author of two co-authored books: “Transform Your Life Book 2 Inspirational Stories and Expert Advice” and “Energy of Receiving”, available on Amazon. Plus, I’ve written a new book (in the making for 13 years), Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life, that’s now available for online sale and distribution (PDF format). Buy it here.

As well, you can hire us to promote your book, band, business, or services here: https://www.facebook.com/MurreyMakers-103294764612382/

Be the best version of who you want to be and let us promote you!

Information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

Follow me on Twitter at: TakeOnYourself