Teaser from the second edition of Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life (renamed, Have Yourself a Wholly Vibrant Life

Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)

Quite simply, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) cured my addiction/habit of finger skin-picking/chewing. And I believe my story might help others, so I feel compelled to share it. You might wonder what I mean by “picking my fingers.” Years ago I quit biting my fingernails, but I only traded that habit for something less. The main cause of the “picking” had not been addressed.

I bought a book called, Tapping the Healer Within because my acupuncture doctor had told me about it, and because I had tried everything else. I found that book a bit convoluted and besides, it mostly dealt with phobias and anxieties – neither of which I thought I had. More importantly, it was difficult for me to hold the book and try to tap on my body with my other hand. Or maybe that was only my excuse – but the book, though interesting to me, wasn’t enough to help me.

A few weeks before my personal EFT visit with a local therapist, my encouraging hubby and I watched a mind-expanding show on TLC called, I Can Make You Thin. One of the episodes showed the host using EFT to help people overcome their food cravings. Because I had also tried everything to lose weight, I decided that I really needed some one-on-one personal guidance with that, as well as my finger skin-picking habit.

At about that time, I met an EFT practitioner named, Janice Cunningham (Health Quest Titusville, Florida). I was eager to get in for an appointment. During a 2.5-hour session (on a Saturday) with Janice, I described both of my issues fully. By the time we’d wrapped up our session, I found a total resolution to some deep-seated wrong mental programming, and amazingly, I had the best night’s sleep that I’d had in years that night! I guess I had not even realized that my sleep pattern had also been an issue.

My appointment with Janice also greatly helped me to release the finger skin-picking addiction. Janice and I spent nearly two hours going back into my past, into my former marriage, teenage years, and finally, childhood years. I realized that I had picked up my habit of fingernail-biting at the same time asthma began – when I was six years of age. My mom had always been a terrible nail-biter, biting right down into the quick, so I knew I’d picked up the habit from mom, I simply had not realized how much of a connection there was between that habit, my asthma, and my mom.

Example of finger picking on side of my ring fingernail. Yes, sometimes it still occurs when I watch something too intense in a TV show/movie–so perhaps I am not 100% “cured” but I have a LOT more awareness around it and do not continue to pick once I become aware that I’m doing it.

I realized fully during my session that when my mom’s father died, my grandfather, the sadness surrounding his death deeply affected me. When I was six years of age, coincidently, I received an asthma diagnosis. You’ll recall I had explained earlier that my grandfather had died at home after being in the hospital for cancer surgery. They sent him home with the understanding that the doctors had done all they could do. At least my grandfather died at home.

As an aside, one of the things my mother always said was to stay away from hospitals if possible. I think she had heard about people who went to the hospital and died from some infection (like Sepsis) or had the wrong procedure done! My mother’s fear of the hospital was not lost on me. The important thing about that experience for me though, was that even though I was a child, I had a deep connection to my grandfather’s passing, mostly due to how upset my mom was during that time. And because I was thoroughly connected to my mother emotionally.

My mama was very upset about losing her father. She and I, at that time, felt that death was the end. And though our religious belief was that we would see him again in the afterlife, we suffered greatly at the time of his death and for weeks after. I vividly recall believing if she could lose him, I could lose her. And there was no way I could live – I wouldn’t be able to breathe, in fact – without my mom. Knowing what I know now, I hard-wired that grief right into my lungs, because of the emotional charge involved in that event, due to my vivid recall of it.

My EFT session felt like counseling and hypnosis (though I was awake and totally aware of what was happening) as though Janice was talking to me on a deep level. During the session, Janice recommended I take some notes, both of the things I was becoming aware of and how to run through this process again on my own. The following is an account of the written notes I made: 

  • I couldn’t breathe without my mom.
  • I always had tried to “save my mom.”
  • I am not my thoughts.
  • My perception influenced my thoughts but my perceptions were wrong. 
  • The genie is out of the bottle.
  • I do not need the old thoughts.
  • Am I the thought or the awareness?
  • Am I “this” thought, or am I the awareness of “this” thought? 
  • Who sent “this” thought? (My pain body)
  • Examine “this” thought. It will probably be a limiting thought, a no-win thought, and one that would eventually bring pain. 
  • To let go of “this” thought: 1) focus on the feeling of my breath in and out, 2) be the observing presence.
  • When I only observe, I suspend space.
  • Inspiration = In spirit, and inspiration fills me, lights me up from the inside – the same as when someone is in creative mode you feel the creative energy inside, in your heart/chest not in the head area.
  • The Aha moment is when the head agrees to the inner knowing.
  • My habit of biting my fingernails = my fear and anxiety linked to my feeling of not being able to fix/help/save my mom. 
  • Something that can trigger asthma in my body is when I face something I can’t do anything about; when I feel a sense of powerlessness.

Through this experience and the many more that followed, I learned we tend to hold fear as a sort of security blanket. I don’t know why, as I think that is the root cause of most of our suffering. And the Buddhists and Taoists believe and teach that also.

This is also a reason I bring up the topic of God and spiritual things in this book. Our beliefs—whether we have hope or not and if we believe this Universe is friendly or not—have a lot to do with how each of us feels bodily.

You may not think fear is the same as a person who is negative all the time, but I would wager that a person who is consistently afraid of this thing or the other, is a person who puts a lot of emphasis on protecting what they think belongs to them. Some might call that kind of person a control freak. They may be a person who lives for “things” and is a pack rat or hoarder. They may also be the kind of person who suffers because of all the things and people to whom they are attached. There’s a lot of healing in letting go, of people, places, and things. And you can’t take any of it with you when you transition (or pass away) from this life to whatever comes next.

The Bible in the book of Philippians has a verse that instructs us to think about whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, excellent, or praiseworthy. And the author of those words, Paul, said that as we think these thoughts the God of peace will be with us. I used to encourage my mother to focus on these things—and during her last two or three years, if not more, she did, because she was always in gratitude during our last visits.

Janice used EFT in a compassionate and caring way. The end result of the two hours for my fingers was every difficulty my mom had ever had, in her marriage, health, etc. I felt as though I needed to help her, or ‘SAVE’ her. Though mom had a very strong faith in Jesus, it was always something I had felt – that I needed to save her. Once we broke this down and got to this deep-seated REASON for my habit, so many other things lifted within my mind and body as well. I can’t say enough wonderful things about EFT. If you think you’ve tried everything to find relief from anxiety, depression, weight issues, nerve problems, etc. I implore you to seek out an EFT therapist in your area. You do not need to “believe in it” for it to work for you. And what do you have to lose?

Over the years, I took the words attributed to Jesus in the Bible about “saving people” to mean, “love people.” For I am not responsible for saving anyone else or even making them happy. However, the cells of my body hold me accountable for making myself happy (it feels good when I align with my Soul) to keep my Temple (Mind and Body), healthy. I can love my enemies, but I don’t have to live with them!

Thus, because I am a super responsible person – I’m supposed to do something. (This is the conflict that causes the habitual negative behavior). And because I have an analytical mind, I often find my thoughts at odds with the evidence-based medicine that is predominantly used in hospitals, as I believe the evidence of healing I’ve experienced is true too—anecdotal experience is real and is true! 

I relied on prayer, EFT, breath work, reflexology, and all kinds of alternative methods to calm and help myself think clearly when my husband was in the hospital in October 2022. I was dumbstruck how little the hospital staff communicated with each other, even though they wheeled a computer into the room with them each time! I found myself telling each doctor, intern, resident, specialist, and nurse who came into the room to see my husband most all of the same things because they did not relay the information to each other. Since I am a business analyst in Information Technology by trade the lack of appropriate information handoffs I witnessed was alarming!

p.s. I used to teach EFT at a Wellness clinic in St. Petersburg, Florida and I have lectured on the benefits of EFT at several events. I am planning on offering some general introductory EFT sessions via Zoom if anyone is interested in participating–let me know in the comments.

To buy the new book, Have Yourself a Wholly Vibrant Life, please visit the link: https://amzn.to/44gRvpD

In this magnificent Universe

Omniscience knows ALL. Omniscience is always with you because you are a fractal of Omniscience. You are truly never alone in this ever-expanding Universe.

Be the best version of who you want to be–because if you’re reading my words your soul is probably beckoning you to align with it and live up to your highest ideals. Not perfect because who is perfect? Most stagnate or ‘get stuck’ while on their way to being whatever they think perfection is. Making progress is enough. Carrying your Karma lightly is enough. Be kind to yourself while living responsibly. Who you ARE affects us ALL. We Are All Connected.

The information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

About us

My husband is an award-winning illustrator, plus he’s a seasoned guitarist, bass player, and songwriter (with over 400 original songs). You can view some of his artwork and listen to all of his songs at: http://listen4music.com

Here’s a video of us performing on Vimeo: https://vimeo.com/416711742?ref=fb-share

About me, your Spiral Sister

I would love to speak at your bookstore, crystal shop, acupuncture/chiropractor office, natural health foods store, art fair, music, or yoga festival. I support healthy lifestyle businesses. 

I invite you to check out my new metaphysical book–Blue Eyes: Ethereal Messages of Connection. There are two versions (Kindle and paperback) on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3WV68KF

I’m an Amazon bestselling author of two co-authored books: “Transform Your Life Book 2 Inspirational Stories and Expert Advice” and “Energy of Receiving” available on Amazon. Plus, I documented how I naturally reversed 30+ years of chronic asthma in my holistic health book, Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life, that’s available on Barnes and Noble with the second edition coming out soon on Amazon.


Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/takeonyour

Mom, why did you bite your fingernails?

Mom, why did you bite your fingernails?

For as long as I can remember my mom bit her nails. And I always wondered why. She used to tell me it was “just a habit.”

My mother was a woman of strong faith, having been raised in a devoutly Christian home. She was also a deep thinker, earnest student, and hard worker. Mom’s parents never argued in front of their children either. So, what caused my mom to feel inferior (which can be a cause for such types of habits)?

As an aside: I picked up the habit from my mom and bit my nails for over 20 years. I had low self esteem as a teen, and often thought I had an inferiority complex!

Asking the question

Now, in my fifties, one morning (three years after my mom’s death), I sat in meditation and silently asked, “Mom, why did you bite your nails?”

The answer: “It was a way of hiding.”

And I got an image of how one hides a smile behind a hand, and when a man twists his mustache hair. I never had the thought before that one can hide behind their hand while biting one’s fingernails.

Hmmm, hiding? Hiding from what? I quickly retorted in thought.

Almost as soon as the first answer came, the second came. Hiding her soul.

How does one hide their soul?

Then, I was on a quest.

Why and how do we hide our soul? And is this a fight with our inner-being?

Are we reserved in behavior because we are afraid to let our innermost thoughts out?

Do we feel we will be judged?

Why would my mom have felt she would be judged? As especially in her youth, when presumably her nail biting started, she would have had no reason to fear judgment.

But, my mom was painfully shy. Always preferring to stay in the background. My mom preferred solitude to group gatherings—unless the gathering was in church (but even there, she didn’t like the spotlight).

Do we question our power?

One of the only times I saw my mom speak publicly, was when the church congregation was asked to share an individual testimony (of God showed up or intervened in their life).

I would listen to my mom’s personal testimony with awe, each and every time. And I had often wished my dad could have been there, at the prayer meeting, to hear mom’s words. Mom spoke with a gentle tone, but at the same time, a commanding authority. To me, this meant mom was speaking from a profound knowing. From a place of truth.

Are we afraid we can’t live up to the expectation of our soul?

As I searched the Internet on the subject of our soul, I found a series of quotes by author, Parker J. Palm. One of his quotes that caught my attention follows:

Parker J. Palm quote

As soon as I read Parkers quote, I realized he had also touched on the soul phrase given to me in the early 2000s that set me on my Awakening journey. The phrase, which became my mantra, We Are All Connected.

In summary

So far, the way I commune with my soul, and share what I find, (that aligns with the lessons I have learned by sitting with these questions), is the way I speak and share about the mantra, We Are All Connected. We Are Not Alone. And that we are more powerful than we can imagine.

Community means never losing the awareness that We Are All Connected.

Whether we feel less than, insecure, are shy, fearful, or that we may not express our truth in a clear way, we CAN speak and share from our soul, from our innermost truth. We simply need a courageous push or willingness to do so.

Perhaps we are old souls. But that is a question for another meditation. OM

About me

I have a passion for WORDS and Connecting people. In particular, I love speaking and writing about spiritual and consciousness raising topics, holistic wellness and simple healthy living. I am empathic, intuitive, compassionate, and kind, with a keen and unified wisdom about life.

I’m an Amazon bestselling author of two co-authored books: “Transform Your Life Book 2 Inspirational Stories and Expert Advice” and “Energy of Receiving”, available on Amazon. Plus, I’ve written a health book (in the making for 13 years), Take It Upon Yourself to Live a Wholly Vibrant Life, that’s available here.

Observations about the author

Conversations surrounding emotional balance, moral ambiguities, and deep spiritual truths (such as We Are All Connected, and Put Your Hands Together When You Pray), are what Sheila is most passionate about. She feels a profound empathic Connection with people and what they’re going through by merely sharing her own truth, by speaking freely about her personal struggles and the challenges she continues to overcome. Sheila strives to ease lonelines, help those exiting toxic relationships, and to remind us all that we are stronger than we think we are, and that Everything Resolves to Gratitude in the end.

Let us serve you

My husband is an award-winning illustrator, plus he is a seasoned guitarist, bass player, and songwriter (of over 400 original songs). You can view some of his artwork and listen to all of his songs at: http://listen4music.com

Here’s us: https://vimeo.com/416711742?ref=fb-share

Be the person your soul beckons you to be and let us promote you!

Here’s us: https://vimeo.com/416711742?ref=fb-share

Information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.