This is a multifaceted issue, but let me give it to you bluntly:

The world is full of assholes.

Rude, obnoxious, arrogant, and hateful people.

We can’t avoid them all either because… they walk/drive amongst us.

We can’t kill them either, even to think those kinds of thoughts ripples outward to The Field.

A lot of people are bothered by that type of behavior.

I learned long ago that hurt people, hurt people. But the Buddhist way is to detach from it so we don’t suffer. Which is why we walk away (or hang back from the angry driver).

As well, you probably know, as do I, we (the greater We), can’t change anyone.

I say all this not from a place of judgment, but of hard-earned experience, a lot of counseling, and working on my Self.

My friend was experiencing embarrassment because she is an American in another country. Another American came into an establishment and acted inappropriately. He was rude, brash, loud, and demanding. She felt sorry for the others in the place that had to witness his poor behavior. She sure didn’t want to see or hear him.

I know it’s a hard truth to hear… but these people exist in any country. Even within family circles.

I have been where she is (not the country but the situation)… I was married to an asshole. Actually, two of them.

It makes no difference the gender either. I have sat with males and females, gay and straight, who have been in relationships with assholes.

I have been sitting quietly working with my boss, only to have my asshole ex-husband come storming in, yelling and raving, to find me because I wasn’t home on time.

I have been the passenger when he decided to road rage with someone.

I have been trying to enjoy a holiday family dinner when the ex went into a downward emotional spiral.

I get why we feel embarrassed. But we shouldn’t. Because in truth, it’s not our fault.

My intention in writing this is to share what I’ve learned with hope that it might help someone else.

Spread the word…

We don’t have to feel embarrassed over anyone’s bad behavior. We are only responsible for our own thoughts and actions.

Don’t let anyone steal your joy.

Everything Resolves to Gratitude in the end.

Be as water and dance

Be as water and dance while you have legs. Just remember oil and water don’t mix. —Sheila Murrey

Yours in consciousness-expansion as we evolve and revolve during our mystical awakening. All while doing-my-egoless-best, to take you on a limitless, spiraling thought ride to better health, through doing more with ease, to help us sustain the JOY in our lives! (With lots of Gratitude throughout.)

Sheila “Spiral Sister” Murrey

The information provided is for educational purposes only and is not intended to treat, diagnose or prescribe.

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My husband is an award-winning illustrator, plus he’s a seasoned guitarist, bass player, and songwriter (with over 400 original songs). You can view some of his artwork and listen to many of his songs at: https://www.youtube.com/user/richardmurrey

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17 thoughts on “Integrating the Spirals: To a friend who was embarrassed over a stranger’s rude behavior

  1. When I went to Cuba on a medical mission in 2000, some of my co-travelers were using drugs and doing other things that could’ve landed them in jail. How stupid can you be? If you don’t respect the laws and culture of other countries, you will most certainly bring trouble on yourself.

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  2. I commend your friend for her patience with that rude American. I would have been sorely tempted to go up to him and say, “It’s people like you who give Americans a bad name.” Very thought provoking post, Sheila.

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    1. I commend her too, Michael. I once told an old man that he was a control freak. I had been walking our little shih-tzu fur children (2010) and he bitched at me for letting them smell his flowers or shrubs. I would not have let them pee on them, but I thought about letting them pee on him! Sometimes, people get on my last nerve. So, yes, life’s a process.

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  3. I can imagine your friend thinking…that ass fits the sterotype that we have already…we don’t need help! Sheila…I can take about anything but rudeness. I just won’t tolerate it. I usually walk away when something happens. Some people don’t think before they talk…that is where the problem comes in….and some people simply don’t care…those are the worst. We all can be rude at some points and regret it…its the ones that don’t that I can’t stand.

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      1. Yes I go to a Church that has a grand total of 18 people at the most. I love it Shelia… It’s country people who are real.
        I saw a George Harrison quote the other day and I loved it. “Live in the world but not of the world”

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